Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
He just stared me dead in the eye as he continued to beat off. Then said "you were going to catch me sooner or later".
I'm just gonna eat nachos and wine fruit forever.
You couldn't even walk but you came into the kitchen with the funnel and begged me to put beer in it
Man, that hitchhiker cursed me.
I havent moved from the couch and I'm licking peanut butter from a spoon, I'm a beautiful person.
You know its an epic night when omar the garbage man gives you a ride home at 6 in the morning.
He's eating me out right now. That's how bad he is.
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
thank you for being so understanding of my weak stomach and poor self-control
My parents are being so annoying about my colon.
Randomize
