So I'm at the Chevron by your house. I need a condom and a couch.
Together?
Preferably.
just caught my little brother jacking off the family pet
Do you think this abandoned cigarette has herpes? cuz I'm tempted.
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
at last call she tried to get the bartender to fill her flask. when he refused, i had to stop her from trying to pour the rest of her beer in there.
whatever a "slut portfolio" is, mine is apparently almost complete
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
He and I are basically the same person, except he has a glorious penis and I have glorious breasts.
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
I have to be more responsible. I've dropped three lighters into my bong today.
I am going home. I have pee on my pants. Rachel is driving and I and drunk. It is not Rachels pee. It is my pee.
Sex to movie scores is my best choice of the year. You've had an orgasm but have you had an orgasm with an entire orchestra.
Be there in a sec. We have to stop at Target to buy her underwear first.
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
Randomize
