Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
it's not our fault the pink and the sink are so close together.
I bet i've been more pregnant than you.
If there was a creeper hall of fame you and me would be the first two inductees
so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
There are reggae songs being written about me...where have I gone wrong in life?
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
He pulled a bucket of fried chicken out of his backpack as a peace offering. Under the chicken was a rainbow bag of weed. We're dating again.
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
I started a USA chant at the bar last night for no reason, other than being plastered. Within 15 seconds, I was standing on a table and the whole bar was chanting but nobody knew why.
I probably shouldn't be taking relationship advice from my side piece...
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
Randomize
