Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
just went trash diving in my work clothes for weed. A&E's intervention here i come.
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
Just got judged by the front desk clerk, 2 maids and a security guard at the Sheraton. I've decided to use this as a character building experience.
ok... i just had to be reminded that people in animal costumes were feeding me shots at the bar.
Best surprise in my car. A cookie, sliced kiwi and the rest of my margarita. Work is going to be awesome.
Asking the homeless man what buss shelter is the warmest was not a good idea
I'm told I threw my cigarettes at the TV one by one Shouting about the cast of Community.
I got really upset about missing him last night when I was demonstrating penis sizes of the people I've slept with using a tape measurer to my roommates
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
well i mean, we just followed them into an alien and astronaut party. there was tin foil everywhere
He's not drinking on his 21st. Shooting vodka infused Nerf bullets at him would just make a mess and I don't want to be a creep and spike anything... I don't understand awkward boys
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
She kept giving the uber driving directions and we all thought they were wrong so we'd send him the other way. Turns out she wasn't guiding us home, but to the half gallon that she hid in the bushes on the way to the bar.
Drunk within and hour of coming home from work, merry christmas bitch
Randomize
