So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
he looked like jesus. just the kind of jesus i would have sex with.
I was so drunk i thought Kathy Griffin was funny
He just refered to Steak and Shake as "a good place for couples". I will definitely not be shacking tonight.
you kept yelling at her to "show me your genitals" until the bouncers told us to leave...at which point you showed them YOUR genitals...
please don't ever take me to a strip club again...
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
She posts like 3 statuses a day pleading for pity. Responding positively would be like giving a dog a treat for shitting on the floor.
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
He said female orgasms are a myth and refuses to even try to give me one.
If I don't at least start a parade that spirals into drunken riots then I'm calling it a fail of a birthday
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
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