So she farted while we were having sex but I was afraid she would stop because she was emberessed so i just went ahead and took the blame and apologized
My toast was "here's to being positive, and testing negative... Cheers!"... after that chick gagged on her shot, everyone knew.... slut.
Guys who wear capris make me want to kill endangered species.
I cant wait for the day that I tell my daughter I named her after my favorite porn star.
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
At one point last night while tipping the bartender you looked at him and said "If I need money later, I'm taking this back"
My professor complimented me on the well drawn penis on my face then asked if I would like a seat closer to the garbage can.
Tonight was the second time that I've pretended like English was my 2nd language to avoid conversation w a creeper.
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
He probably thinks you're playing hard to get.
Hard to get?? I'm playing leave me the fuck alone.
I just need some dick and some jimmy johns
Do you sleep with the same women I've already slept with on purpose?
Dick very happy bro
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
Randomize
