He told me he was ok to drive home. Then I found him face-planted in the parking lot.
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
I feel like someone had their period in my eyes.
I'm sorry I got a little outta control last night.
We fucked in his mom's shower and all I could think about was being too old to be sneak banging while someone's mom was out of town and how much mildew was on the shower curtain. Fuck you, Adulthood.
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
Dude it's huge. I don't usually like looking at those things, but you're kind of forced to stare that horse in the face.
A girl just asked me if we had pregnancy tests and a coworker had to stop me from telling her I was a pregnancy test. THAT is why I don't drink at work.
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
She's currently doing somersaults across the kitchen floor without underwear on. We may not make it to the bar.
He struggled for a second trying to unhook my bra and I said "4/10. Novice."
My boobs smell like weed again. This happens way too often.
You still owe me one bodily function mess clean up.
You pee on the floor one time and you never hear the end of it...
How long do I have to listen to him talk about the chickens before telling him I just really want to fuck? Note: it's already been twelve minutes.
Randomize
