so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
I am watching Grease 2 and properly learning how to apply a condom to a banana. This is a sign from God that this is the closest I will ever get to having the need for one.
we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
He asked me what I wanted the cake to say and I then asked him if "I'm sorry for throwing up in your bed last night" was too long. He said it was...
Clearly the ONLY reason why you were voted employee of the month is because of your upside-down beer funneling skills.
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
I'm so tired I just poured monster in my coffee.
And it tastes incredible.
And I have chest pains.
Thank you contacting dial-a-boner. Currently, our boner is on a run to service another client. You can either wait 2 hours for service, or share concurrent service with the current client.
Also, since I switched back to this phone I've found a crop of dick pics and your funeral arrangements.
Dude, I traded weed for crunch berries. Happy Thursday.
We turned a wake into a bar crawl.
After you smoke one night. Just whisper in a barely audible voice, "Grey Poupon"
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
Randomize
