yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
I know i'm drunk when the "men" sign on the bathroom sounds chinese
Pretty girls always come out on top. Or bottom. Whatever. Point is we come out with their boyfriends.
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
We FINALLY fucked. I swear that's the longest I've ever held out for
Umm you met him three days ago....
I said what I said
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
He was trying to hotbox the banana suit. Of course we traded him for vodka.
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
I just dropped $300 on lingerie. He better rip this off with his teeth.
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
We had sex on a couch that was held together by Velcro. Want to know an unsexy sound? Velcro ripping apart under your bare ass.
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
Randomize
