he keeps dipping things in ranch and feeding them to me
You said that we had to leave the party together and proceeded to repeat the "ducks fly together" speech from The Mighty Ducks word for word. Soon the whole party was quite and started chanting quack..quack...quack..
What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
He's prob getting laid right now and I'm sitting alone in my duct tape shoes.
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
For the amount of money I just spent on my dogs toe, I could have fucked the entire B squad at a low end strip club.
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
YET AGAIN, my financial planning for 2013 consists MOSTLY of eating chipotle as "brain food" and drinking Heavily before the Jeopardy contestant test.
i'm not drunk or reckless enough to have you track my every fucking move. I AM AN ADULT
I get stoned and write a 15 page history report in two hours. She gets stoned and cries because she "doesn't know which shade of pink is the real one".
It's like the drive of shame on fucking Christmas. Happy birthday Jesus
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
I like the new guy, he keeps beer in the fridge.
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
Well, thanks for not letting me sleep with anyone, but no thanks for telling everyone I have the clap.
Randomize
