That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
i'm at the point now where i want him to say anything. even an apology for his boomerang-shaped penis would be nicer than no comment.
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
On 3 separate occasions, she grabbed my bullhorn to announce to the entire party she had fucked me.
I ended up with bruises on the back of my knees. Tell me again how I did this?
she was trying to use her iTranslate app while we were having sex.
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
The amount of precision it takes to urinate into a 2 liter bottle while hammered is undeniably difficult.
My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.
I walked into the bathroom and there's this 6'5" cop washing his hands. He looks at me and goes, "Heard you singing outside. Sound real pretty."
No more tequila EVER.
Randomize
