How is Miami?
Omk. I'm shitggaved om loincoln
Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
These headphones make me feel like I'm sitting on John Mayers lap and he's singing just to me. I picture like a pitch black room with a single spotlight on us. Also, convinced Kyle to give me percocet soo.
Just had a guy dressed only in a towel ask me for a cig, hug me and kiss me then proceeded to pee of the balcony while still talking to me and callin me baby
The sun is so bright. Whhyyyyy. EYES ARE DEAD.
Where is a good place to buy a New Year's outfit that acknowledges I don't have tits but screams I suck dick like a champ?
I couldn't find my shirt this morning so I stole one from his eight year old sister. Slutted up my outfit quite a bit.
yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
I showed up to a booty-call in my onesie pajamas and rubber boots
I damn near set my vagina on fire. WHILE The Flaming Lips played in the background. Intensely apropos.
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
coughing up blood. I'm leaving for the doctor now. P.S. I just won $350 on the wheel of fortune machine in the casino.
I'm so happy we share a mutual love of laughing at religion.
I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.
Randomize
