Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
Moved my bed either I'm a whore or every guy I have ever slept with hid condom wrappers under my bed
this ugly chick literally cried last night because i wouldnt let her give me head
You know your in for a great weekend when you buy the booze already in crutches
I knocked myself out momentarily last night when I fell and hit my head off of my jewelry box while trying to take his pants off... while he was passed out.
You were force feeding yourself jello and you kept repeating, "I will not surrender"
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
I'm watching Russian dudes pole-dance. For research.
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
My booty call fought through ice and a foot of snow to get here. He brought booze, food, and cigarettes for three days. My vagina is the greatest motivator of all time.
Says the girl who left her friends to go have phone sex in the bathroom at Michael's
There's a dude wearing a banana suit at the house across the street....
YOU CANT JUST BLOW GUYS BC THEY’RE NICE TO YOU LEXI
I CAN IF I WANT TO
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
Randomize
