My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
if i could have babies with my dog i totally would cause i know thay would be fucking hott babies.
I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
24 hour fitness called offering me a free trial stating that you referred them to me. I told them you have been taking pics of naked guys in the locker room and selling them online.
That's not a bad idea, actually...
I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
do you realize that she was the awkward lesbian in high school and now bangs more girls than probably both of us combined?!
We really need to check into harvesting part of our liver now
my goal is to not remember how i make a living by 9pm saturday night
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
I mean, the sex was awesome last weekend, but I didn't even imagine I'd reached ovarian rupture status.
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
I need you to be best friend brutally honest about whether or not I can go into public like this.
You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
Swear on my life the dude next to us just ordered a pizza and I will fight to the death for a slice
Randomize
