dude I went to cubs game with my mustache, aviators, and a hooded sweatshirt. Do you think it was irony or fate that there were four 17 year old girls in front of us?
So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
If there was a creeper hall of fame you and me would be the first two inductees
shape ups are the best shoes to wear when youre stoned. its like walking on little trampolines every step.
why would you automatically assume i'm high...
you just told me you're eating the powder of a lemonade mix.
You woke up, laughed, proceeded to throw up on me and then passed out again.
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
I need a priest, doctor, and therapist after this weekend.
You came walking in the backyard at 10am, in cowboy boots, a new shirt, and had no money,....we lost you for 15 hours....i think you just need a camera crew, or an assistant. IMPRESSED!
We had sex in his hot tub. Then we saved a mouse that almost drown in his pool. We celebrated our heroism with more sex.
If you can't accept me drawing a Santa hat on your penis then we can't be friends
so i woke up at six am and his bathroom was flooded. i think i fucked shit up in my sleep.
If I don't get struck by a lightning bolt from God by midnight it will be a Christmas miracle.
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