doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
i convinced her i was a yoga teacher by showing her some warm-ups my high school track coach made up
The plus side of allergy season is that after our weekend coke binge my runny nose fits right in.
Well, according to foursquare I checked in "@under the bushes" at 3:27am. This could explain some things.
Yeah he had his two razors labeled "face" and "pubes". Should I be disgusted or impressed?
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
I'm sitting in the corner at the bar with a poolstick in case a brawl breaks out. Some crazy shit is going down and I'm trying to show my feathers like a horny peacock.
I've been told that their best stripper is on maternity leave. NEVER AGAIN.
No worries, I've prioritized my homework into "can do drunk" and "should be sober" categories. We're good.
Can we make love to the Space Jam soundtrack?
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
Pinterest knows I’m getting divorced
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
Randomize
