I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
you were carrying a trash bag around insisting it was your purse. I'll let you guess how your night went
"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
I hid my booze in my old Sesame Street lunch box. Big Bird might be disappointed, but I feel Oscar the Grouch would approve.
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
I feel like it'll be a success as long as she doesn't end up dead in a ditch. There has to be a line somewhere.
Best oral ever, hands down so to speak. but I'm starting to want to meet that lesbian truck driver he says he's better than. Just for comparison purposes of course.
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
The lady sitting right behind me on the bus has baby birds in her purse. Shes feeding them bugs from a cup with a pair of tweezers... I love san francisco!
Worst walk of shame man. They had a fire drill at 7am, had to walk out of her all girl dorm wearing my Everday I'm Hustling sweater
Yeah. I couldn't figure out why my toes hurt. Apparently, the guy I was dancing with, kept running them over with his wheelchair.
Just don't let me get too drunk. At one point I pulled out my dick and pissed at that party. Like on the wall.
Only you could make a reflective vest look even remotely sexy
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
Lucky bitch I'm at work covered in Jeff pee. And my hair smells like beer because I was trying to prove a point about PBR serving multiple purposes.
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