Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
We just built a bong out of a pineapple. I am never leaving hawaii. Ever.
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
my hippie aunt just sent me some brownies with a note saying not to eat them under any circumstances until finals are over. excited.
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window
i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there
There's something very strange about masturbating in a hotel room. I feel like I'm cheating on my room...
Here you are just trying to masturbate and I'm talking to you like your an initiate for some secret society.
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
We kinda got asked to leave the strip club and on the way out, you fell again. When you finally got up we got a standing ovation from the girls behind the bar and you took a bow. It was awesome.
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
I was just drinking but now I'm drinking and chasing with red bull. I call this "getting ready for work"
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
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