we're blogging at a bar
There is a banner on a house by campus that says "welcome to college dads. Thanks for dropping off your daughters!"
my roomate judo was messing around with a girl who recently had a kid, when he was sucking her tits milk came out lmao
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
No, you don't understand. If the words "stop," "alcohol poisoning," and "regret" aren't in the same sentence by the end of the night, I will have failed this birthday.
I feel like the only phrases I can clearly speak while drunk consist of: i'm fucking drunk, chug, and shots
He said he was gonna go pull a lochte and the next thing we know he's outside ass naked peeing in the neighbors kiddie pool.
Everytime I try to keep track of the amount of people I slept with I always forget about that guy I met on the dc metro, where I woke up to him organizing his Special K and Molly and I was covered in sleeping cats.
I woke up in your kitchen with my ID in my hand and my nails were painted electric blue. Dude.... never let me have fireball again.
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
Next time I think it’s a good idea to hook up with any of your wife’s family members or friends just kick me in my dick
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