Right on... I dropped my chapstick
I blacked out
I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
Just got kicked in the balls by a girl in tap shoes. Fuck EVERYTHING
well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
he keeps trying to sext me and all I can do is respond with descriptions of what im eating.
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
he was holding the bottle like a running back yelling for security and the national guard as he was being tackled
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
You need to stop vomiting in the washing machine, bro. For real this time.
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
If you get me a sex toy for Christmas everyone in my family will question our relationship.
She's the prison bitch to my Martha Stewart.
Okay so my roommate deals some drugs so whenever he leaves we can hook up, be ready
I didn't know I was the on call booty call damn
I just balanced a full glass of chocolate milk on my left boob. Don't think i've ever been more proud.
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