Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
a kid in a transformers shirt tried to pick me up last night at work. he also rolled up on a bicycle, the kind with pedals. do i look that easy?
you left your dildo in my car
rules of finders keepers apply
I think you came in my ear last night and I had to pick it out infront of my kids in class today
So this text is costing me two dollars because I'm out of the country, but I just wanted to let you know it went well with the stripper last night
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
Couldn't find any balloons, so we're doing whippets out of condoms. Being a ho has its benefits.
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
I remember because you made a pirate noise when you came.
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
I feel like I should throw some tampons around my workspace so everyone will know what's really going on
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
Woke up this morning to him making out with me in his sleep, then I had to go on a scavenger hunt to find a used condom before my roommate got back... it was under my pillow.
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