Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
I'll buy you a vibrator, we can get married for tax benefits, and live happily ever after with lots of doggggs.
You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
I slept with some guy because he drew a dinosaur on my arm
There's a skateboard on the patio and all the chips are gone. The note on the fridge says 'don't buy cheese'. Stop letting her go outside.
Nice just gets you lonely or dead. I don't like those options.
He fell on top of me at a party. I slept with him a week later. We've been fucking for 2 moths. Most successful relationship ever.
Sorry, but when you makeout with a guy in a panda suit, you know something has to change.
Then, right before he came he said "I want to buy you so many things!" What the fuck?!
just chugging fertility tea and vodka, no big deal.
Yeah but you let me touch your butt. You're clearly the winner.
Whelp, I woke up on the front lawn this morning. I have got to stop wearing these underwear. Every time I do, I end up puking in someone's greenery.
Do you want to get naked and order pizza with me
Cancel your plans for the fourth someone is streaming iron chef on twitch
Randomize
