Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
Thank you for holding my vodka while the police let me ride their horse.
you kept yelling at her to "show me your genitals" until the bouncers told us to leave...at which point you showed them YOUR genitals...
please don't ever take me to a strip club again...
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
Your mom won me $100 and you showed me your tits. Solid evening.
I just tried to order ice cream on my bagel. I think I should just call it
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
Word my sister pulled through for me and brought vodka shooters for the plane. its about to be a sloppy 4 hours
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
What's the polite way to say "hey I don't actually want to fuck you, I just swiped right on you because you didn't like me in high school and I needed validation"
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
So I was laying on the couch reading a book and he texted me. All I saw was the image of him spitting on my vagina last night in the moonlight. I gagged.
I love how my parents bring water bottles filled with vodka on family trips
Want ramen today?
I need a salad
SALAD DOESNT WARM YOUR HEART AND BELLY
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