She said her name was "party"
Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
Dibs on passing out in front of the toilet.
I didn't know it was possible to throw up mid-sneeze.
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
I give him blow jobs while he watches sports.. how am I not his gf yet??
Practice the "sorry I may have given you herpes" conversation with me before I call him and break the news
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
I don't want to tell anyone! People who sleep with senators either end up in porn or guantanamo
i'm almost positive she was a dude but like it doesn't even matter
re read what you just said
I think a girl on my floor is watching zombie porn. There is literally no other description for the noise coming from her room.
I looked so sad that Jessica gave me a bar of soap. So that's where I'm at.
we watched a guy take a shot of tequila while riding a unicycle
DO I FUCKING *LOOK* LIKE SOMEONE WHO HAS THEIR ACT TOGETHER!?!? THE ANSWER IS "NO"!
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
Randomize
