My goal for tonight: make tomorrow as awkward as humanly possible.
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
You ass. You're not the one who bought me flowers, so obviously you will not be the recipient of the blow job of gratitude.
Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.
Yea. I'm excited about this party too
I feel like we should at least be hungover if we're gonna be this grown up.
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
We did Irish Car Bombs out of butter trays, the influence of the retired community is astounding- I didn't know people even owned more than one butter tray.
Sorry for cyberstalking your dad.
you called me drunk last night to talk about summoning sex demons with magic WTF
We are all done wearing pants today
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
i left you alone for two hours TWO HOURS & when i got back i had to rush you to the hospital because you were covered in Smooth Away pads & drinking the bong water..
I woke up in my basement holding someone else's underwear and a bottle of mouthwash . I wish I could explain more than that but i can't remember ...
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