I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
not allowed to tweet this cos she's following me but i definitely just got head in a stairwell of the university of chicago. wanted you all to know.
And then he said "my dick isn't hard enough and your tits aren't big enough for this to work"
he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away.
He found my weave.. Think he'll still fuck me Friday? And how do I ask for it back?
Lost another pound. Switching from beer to hard liquor did this body good.
we put a pacifier in your mouth because you kept drunkenly singing country music.
i tried to knight her with my dick. she said it was unromantic. what an ungrateful attitude for a knight.
I go to a class slightly intoxicated and they bring in a baby. What a life.
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
Today is my 3 year wedding anniversary...and I've seen three different dicks.
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
Randomize
