dude u gotta turn down the techno when u bang that chick its creepy
Smoked a bowl on a rollercoaster. Literally ON. Beat that.
It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
EW EW EW EW THAT PENIS BELONGS TO SOMEONE'S FATHER! THAT PENIS BELONGS TO OUR FRIEND'S FATHER! THAT PENIS HELPED CREATE OUR FRIEND! YOU'RE NOT ALLOWED TO ADMIRE IT!
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
We broke into the space center. If i go to jail I wanted to tell you, you have a fantastic dick. Use it wisely.
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
Its okay that he doesn't remember you, he only remembers girls by their boobs and I think you were wearing a jacket
He was making Jim beam nachos. Chips soaked in whiskey with cheese
He is currently in a meeting and I am sexting him in Italian
And he's using Google translate to reply. Who says cross country relationships can't be fun?
This time last year I was crying in a church parking lot without shoes or a bra, so the years can only go up from here
He referred to his penis as "The Purple Headed Yogurt Slinger." I'm both disgusted and turned on
I've never been so drunk at home. I just sat on the toilet playing with toilet paper for ten minutes, I almost made a paper crane.
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