it's too hot outside to masturbate.
How do you get a 7 on a pregnancy test?
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
Wait, you seriously DON'T keep vodka in your backpack??!??!?
You could become Eskimo brothers with my dad. How can you pass that up? You pussy.
I found a half composed text to you this morning and all it said was HELP M. Is that how I ended up at the bottom of the stairwell in only a tee-shirt and one heel?
considering I never received the text I would go with 'yes'.
The drunk fake out is her specialty. She'll agree to come with us and two seconds later we check to make sure she's still there and we see her booking it down the hall in the opposite direction.
Yes, yes I will fake crap in his house for you.
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
I don't know what his name was or what he looked like, but I remember him rocking me to sleep with his cock
I'd rather have snapchat than feelings.
You are not the cause of late onset lesbianism.
If he thinks I'm canceling my orgy to coddle his stupid fucking behavior, he has another thing coming
what happened last night?
we watched you eat an entire bag of dorritos in the pouring rain... you refused to come inside
Randomize