Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
an ex called crying about her current BF. convo ended in phone sex. i love emotional wrecks
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
only my mom would pack illegal paraphernalia in a care package..
im pretty sure this vending machine only exists when im drunk
I still smell like men's body wash from that drunken shower I took at that stranger's home last night.
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
Final Summary: could he eat a lit sparkler? Probably. Could he do it while peeing off the roof? I'll tell you when you get to the ER.
Well I just finished dry heaving so I think breakfast is a little further out for me
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
I want falafel more than sex right now. That's really saying something for me...
WHY IS THERE A FUCKING DILDO IN PLACE OF MY GEAR SHIFTER IN MY CAR?
So? Find me, fuck me, then you can go to sleep and I'll leave.
Wow. That's the most amazing thing anyone has ever said to me.
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
Randomize
