we sat in the hammock and pretended we were skydiving for three hours. jack actually started crying when i convinced him his chute didnt open.
She said "You blew my mind last night." and I said "nah, I just blew my load." and her mom heard.
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
This flask doesn't match my outfit. I hope the gays don't mind.
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
In a car. Threw up in my mouth. Haven't said a word in 10 minutes.
I just burped jalapeños and cum. That was the most disgusting thing ever.
I've reached the point in my life where I desire cats more than men
You rolled around on the floor, yelled about being a "half-zombie" and bit that guy on the leg who was hitting on me.
Please don't place wagers on my sex life unless you are giving me a cut. With my current sluttiness I feel like I deserve 40% for how much money you'll make
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
I saw a penis covered in glitter tonight.
The first time he ever tried to hold my hand, I moon walked away.
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