I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
i don't think my life will be extraordinarily more meaningful if i let him put his tongue in my butthole.
Just chased ups truck with a half wiped ass for you. You're making dinner tonight
I looked at you and you stared at me dead in the eyes then sprayed febreze at your crotch and winked.
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
mhmm. we know where to go, which places have free bathrooms, how long you can be in one until its sketchy, we have this down to a science. we're like the college sophomore pregaming dream team
Somehow I've got the party rigged to where I get a foot massage every time someone wants a beer out of the fridge. Hellz yeah
His last Google search was "will sperm ruin the retina display on Apple products?"
Well I think won that argument, as the cops were leaving, they offered me a ride to the airport
Yup, two strangers look up at each other and realize the only connection they have is the dead woman they banged to death below them. Magic. They have to be best friends now.
OMG -- There are strippers in the bathroom crying because their power moves aren't good enough to win the competition
Is it weird to smoke a bong with a client from work?
I sharted in my christmas pjs :(
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
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