Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.
i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
its impossible for me to find something that fits my tits my muffin top and my ass all at the same time
She's hidden vodka up her skirt and is riding a parking meter. Things can only get better
seriously, i am too high for the omelet station to be playing Being For The Benefit Of Mr Kite at 7am
THE MIME IS MIMING TO BUST A MOVE KARAOKE. ALL MIME-RELATED EVENTS DESERVE CAPS LOCK
Too bad you can't keep me under your desk. You'd love that wouldn't you? Massages, blowjobs, and I'd be forced to be quiet all day.
at what point last night did i decided to have a photo shoot with your camel toe
Last night I had sex with one of the groomsmen I was in the wedding with. In a stairwell. 13 years my senior. Thinking I should retire from the bridesmaid gig.
I puked into my skirt and then had to carry it to the bathroom and dump it out, Lmfao and it was like 2pm
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
Remember that time you puked in the middle of wendy's?
Yeah, why?
The staff still remembers me for cleaning it up. Thanks for the free frosty and fries
But yeah, I am thinking that "Cake Heresy" will now be a thing
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