you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
I just found out the FDA voted to ban Vicodin, my last connection to this world has been destroyed
i'm sorry if your life is a sore subject
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
I positioned my bed perfectly so around 10 a.m. every morning there are rays of sunshine coming through the window in my room. Now i can tan while PTFO.
You couldve had sex with 2 drunk chicks on an alligator slide.
I have bruises covered in glitter and someone just asked me if I realized I'm bleeding from both ears. This is awkward.
I feel like I just rode a horse, did a million jumping jacks, ran a marathon and need a carton on cigarettes. best sex hands down... EVER
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
By the way if you come home and I'm not wearing pants, just go with it. I didn't have the energy to go searching for some.
we broke the bed, curtan rods, a dresser drawer, and unless I didn't notice it before, we put a hole in the wall. This is why he and I have to fuck in motels.
Take off your clothes and see if he wants to have sex, that's a good way to find out
Remember when I made fun of you when you ran out of toilet paper on your brother's birthday and had to use coffee filters? Guess what happened today
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
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