is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
I keep trying to sit and the chair keeps running away from me
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
He told me his penis would be a "Sad Panda" if I didn't give it a ride through the jungle.
I'm cuddling with a baby pig and drinking champagne right now.
I just threw out a whole Christmas ham, 12 positive pregnancy tests, 3 empty vodka bottles and by ex boyfriends Latina porn collection in the same garbage bag. The homeless person who goes through the bins tonight knows I have nothing left to loose.
They should just send me home - I'm literally doing nothing but watching porn and listening to pandora.
He is like the "hometown sweetheart", but a huge freak. Like "I'll come change your flat tire"....but then fuck you like an animal in the back seat.
You drunkenly hook up with 5 people in one night and suddenly everyone tries to party with you.
I threw a dessert topping at a baby tonight so drink up! If you stay sober tonight I will be very disappointed in you.
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
You know you're high when, "Why can't I steal the duck?!" Becomes a serious question.
I have a cat for love and a booty call for sex. What else could I need?
he's figured out my code; what are you doing = I haven't found a better dick yet
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