And God said, "Let there be Twilight," and it was so.
I should injure you considerably.
apparently vodka and oj turns green when you throw it up
basic color theory
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
My new apartment is within walking distance of both the liquor store and the chinese buffet. This is either going to be my worst life choice ever or my best.
He's my palate cleanser. He's my mint sorbet. He's my saltine cracker. He's who I fuck between people to make the next one better.
I feel like after that many guys, all of the water in your body is just replaced with pure jizz, honestly.
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
I just used FaceTime as a look out while I got a blowjob in the library
And all I ask is the occasional "welcome home from work" blowjob.....and for you to fold my laundry. I hate folding laundry
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
He stole me a cantaloupe and we drunkenly broke into a park and ate it on a bench with my pocket knife. I think i need to marry him
Yesterday I went home with one shoe, today I go home with three. Fucking win.
Randomize
