Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
I think dad's getting high again. His last google search was "awesome ping pong shit."
just so you know, your brother isn't driving home wasted tonight. he is, instead, in my dorm shower screaming about rubbing his butt with my loofah; thought you would be proud
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
Just hit on a fat chick so shed buy me a drink. Then i walked away. Nice to see how the other half lives.
we did rock-paper-scissors to see who would find out if you had alcohol poisoning
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
Did not foresee holding down food at work today to be a struggle today
It gives me purpose in life to help fulfill nerdy fantasies. Like I'm doing something good for mankind and having multiple orgasms in the process.
I can't find a song to express how gay I'm feeling.
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
The bachelor party was supposed to stay local but I think were in mexico.
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
It's not even 8pm on a Friday and I've already got a guy to tell me how big his penis is. Watched anything good on Netflix lately?
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