I love black thongs
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
Talking to this girl is like playing minesweeper on hard. There's red flags everywhere.
dude i've broken up a marriage, I think I can handle a simple engagement.
I think whatever his name is just puked on the stairs. Just an fyi for the morning. Love you.
there is a dude in the bar with no arms getting fed beers by his friends
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
We shaved off his eyebrows I'm pretty sure his fiance will be thrilled at the wedding
I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners.
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
It's not as funny as it sounds. I shit myself at the company Christmas party.
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
Drunk version of me is like a sleeping demon inside of me that awakes to the sound of vodka
Randomize
