please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
Sandwiches are there for you when porn isn't.
he obviously didn't care that i was sleeping and dreaming about ellen degeneres knitting me a christmas sweater.
She started licking your face, then you turned to me and said "I guess thats my cue", and you proceeded to hook up with her.
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
THIS IS A FLATMATE WARNING! The white powder next to sink is washing powder I spilled and is not meant for human comsumption. I repeat- do not digest, snort or smoke the white powder next to the sink!!!!
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
Had a dream that you were held at gun point. But I killed the guy. Then we embraced in the biggest hug while everyone around us clapped... Kinda how I imagine our wedding...
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
I realize ur driving andwont read this til u stop, but I'm sleeping in the bed of the pickup. Please don't hit a deer.
My orgasm happened in two different decades
Randomize
