Also my back is semi rug burned and I'm holding you fully responsible.
I would love to give you more rug burn
My nipple is on Facebook.
Dude WTF? His teammate just started talkin to me on fb! Am I walking around with a "I like to f**k gators" on my forehead?
No, it just says ur easy
hey my socially awkward cousin is our designated driver for summer, we just have to put up with her wierd shit.
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
Just got a birthday card from Camel. How am I supposed to stop smoking when they care?
Then they all walked away with the drinks I bought them, and the fat one slapped me in the face. I left and my car had been towed. Worst night ever.
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
We had a 30 min conversation last night about whether or not to bone that girl with a lisp to see if she moans with one...
You woke me up at 2 am to tell me I could pee in a golf club if I wanted to.
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
Don't be offended, the only thing I'm attracted to right now is snack cakes and chicken wings.
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
Randomize
