Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
forecast for tonight is alcohol, low standards and poor decisions.
I will give you a bj if you get me food. NOT A JOKE. FREE BJ.
my cabbie only has one arm...this can't be safe
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
What happened to "I wouldnt even touch her with a ten foot pole"?
Her vagina devoured it.
I have dibs on his crisis of faith.
I have learned that if you don't want to hook up with the guy who walked you home, food is great compensation.
I'm convinced that the Christmas lights in my room contributed to the great sex.
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
Is it weird that the girl I'm fucking just wished me luck on my date tonight?
Dude. So. Much. Sex. Find a girl in her 30s. Now.
I just caught your son trying to perform fellatio on himself. What do I do?
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
Randomize
