New record: 45 minutes. Afterwards I played We Are The Champions while we cuddled.
this girl ate taco bell on my bed naked last night, it was the sexiest thing ive ever seen
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
Dude I thought this was going to suck, but moving back in with my dad is like being at a frat party every night only everyone is 40 years old.
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
1 month til my stepdad becomes a u.s. citizen, so if you want to get in on the divorce pool its your last chance, $5 a square.
I wonder if they'd let me siphon the gas out my car before they impound it
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
Missing both credit cards and just had a flashback of grinding my nuts on the terrified cab driver for amusement. i am feeling a slight hate for myself right now.
Yeah. I was about to call 911 but I ended up breaking the door frame off then ran and puked all the way home.
A guy claiming to be the Japanese counterpart to the White Power Ranger is trying to take me home....
Idk how much vodka is on these pants but I'm gonna wear them anyway: the biopic
the only reason I'm still sleeping with him is to get the university's secure wifi password
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
its as if im in a choose your own adventure book. except im not the reader and someone else is choosing my fate...one awesome decision at a time.
Randomize