dude i totally did the walk last night came out of her room to see her dad sitting there straight lookin at me...wtf
I was found on the hood of someone elses car... Who would've thought there were 2 white nissans?
I need a leather bustier to keep them in.
Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that.
just hang any plant up and call it mistletoe.
We left around 4 AM after the stripper showed no mercy and dropped into a split on Matt's nose. Massive nosebleed.
mom and dad are leaving for florida on 4/20, this is a sign
Sometimes I'm jealous of turtles because they can just go to their homes whenever they want by putting their heads in their bodies.
How high are you?
My mom just gave me my fake back to buy her more wine.
It is no longer St. Patrick's Day. I should NOT still have green boobs!
Let me tell you how my drug dealer wants me to take his girlfriends little sister to jr prom
No he's great. He's trying to do "sexy stuff" for me now, which is pretty hilarious. He stirred my daiquiri with his penis last night. He also tied a bouquet of flowers around it.
Of all the things I've masturbated to while high, my favorites are ritz chips and trees
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
Randomize
