either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
I have a beer in one hand and a slim fast in another. It's another one of those wednesday nights.
I don't care how high you are, you can't finger me while eating potato chips.
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
after we were done she whispered to my dick "you sir, are a genius"
I guess all those years with her as your babysitter finally paid off.
got blackout drunk at the conference and wandered around Minneapolis with a homeless person until one of the other interns found me...I think I'm ready for adulthood.
Hey, remember when Hot Stuff played in the back of the ambulance? Or no, cause of your concussion...
Whiskey dick has taught us to be smart with our time.
Sounds like she has 4 first names. Like a sad version of Ricky bobby
I had the good sense not to tell her that my summer goal is to get fucked by a med student while wearing a party dress and sparkly shoes
Drunk twilight is the only twilight
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