Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
Apparently my downstairs neighbors don't much appreciate it when I do drunk aerobics at 3am on a Wednesday...
Its not that I don't mind giving her as much as my penis as she wants, its the post sex cigarette I have to supply. Shits $9 a pack.
Put a tip jar next to your bed from now on.
Your good ideas are reason #4 we need to live together.
figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
I have a vague memory of you tryin to ride a unicycle through jimmy johns
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
I was woken up in my old house by the new residents ... I don't even have a Key anymore
Today is all about not throwing up, where the fuck are my keys and does anyone know what happened to that guy in the panda suit my roommate had sex with last night.
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
I wear drunk well.
Randomize
