While in Europe, he bought me a pouring tap to put on my liquor so I don't spill. This means 2 things.1) He really loves me. 2) I'm a noticeable alcoholic.
i totally just wrapped her wedding gift in tin foil. These are the skills 2 bachelor's degrees have given me.
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
i got two bottles of merlot and sorrows to drown, you in??
I offered to buy ihop waffles for all the homeless people outside the metro. It was time to go to bed.
his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord
I vote for a trading skills night. You teach me to juggle, I'll teach you knife fighting, and we'll both learn banjo
we told the drug dealer that our car was dead and we needed a jump so he would bring the drugs to us...
How early is too early to study with margaritas?
I'm literally beginning to think that my sex dreams are prophesies
We banged in my car doggy style with my head out the window. The sky was marvelous and I saw a shooting star. Its destiny; we're meant to fuck forever.
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
"fuck it, let's do moonshine" shouldn't be in ANYONE'S vocabulary.
Just did the "lost my phone, need #'s" post and I got a text saying "go ahead and save me as Ashley-DD because I know you will anyway. I think I love her.
Haha word. Sure I can do that. Help me find which bar has my pants and you'll get free tacos all week
Randomize
