Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
A little girl and i are having a face making battle in mcdonalds
She started it, but I totally finished it.
You're the host. Of course you wear the diaper. It's like wearing the pants.
He tried to stick it in and I asked him what he wanted to name our child and he quit.
They were picking gravel out of my face for an hour. I think I took more out of the road than the road did of me.
Barfights against pavement aren't genrally won by people. Props.
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
it's a drink the shower water kind of morning ...
My Grandma made me promise not to drink more beer, so I'm chugging wine.
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
Come get me we have a petting zoo to throw up in.
Apparently my thong was thrown in the cornfield last night. No one will tell me why.
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
Did you guys just have three hour sex? You both stopped and restarted texting me at the same time
If I were to say yes, would we still be friends?
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
Randomize
