Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
I wish I could drop acid with the muppets
when your hometown is famous for abortion clinic bombings, hurricanes, and jude law's newest bastard, its probably time to move.
I wish you could see the look on my boss's face right now.
wtf?
Before you passed out in the middle of the NHL 10 party you had to prove that you were a better fighter than Patrick Kane. Your not. Thanks for the black eye dipshit.
I made her dinner: Beefaroni with grated parmesan cheese on top. Luckily she showed up drunk and gave me head, "For spending so much time preparing."
He says he's "masters drunk." And if that's anything like "kentucky derby drunk" I know enough to not go over there.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
You weren't a difficult drunk to take care of. I just had to stop you from plunging the toilet once or twice.
yeah, i found the sharpie that everyone use to sign my tits last night. its dead.
On 3 separate occasions, she grabbed my bullhorn to announce to the entire party she had fucked me.
If her puking on your pool table is her sign of a good night, it's time to intervene.
I really just want to eat 20 mcnuggets and slap everyone with the box when I'm done.
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
COME AND FUCKING GET ME I AM IN SOME SORT OF JUNKYARD!!!
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
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