We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
i just stumbled downstairs, still drunk, to hug my dad and wish him a happy fathers day
but fathers day is next sunday
i realized that after i threw up on his bare feet
This is how I know I have no life... Jon and Kate are my emotional roller coaster.
dude if i could bring that prime piece of meat home, id be the luckiest average-looking girl who ever lived
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
Buying the inflatable beer pong table for the pool was one of the best investments I've ever made
I am. I woke up on someone's front lawn dressed as max Payne also be proud.
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
I went out with a plan. I came home with a Brian. THIS WAS NOT PART OF THE PLAN.
i dont know how or why im in the gym right now, but theres a hot cop, a guy i hook up with, and his hot friend. this can only lead to every fantasy i ever had.
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
Randomize