bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
we lost you for like an hour and then found you at some dive bar trying to teach dance lessons
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
It was the most graceful puke ever. I just thought she dropped something underneath the bar until she told me what happened.
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
I woke up and he used my makeup to write "hope you don't get pregnant" on my mirror before he left
The only way that night could have gotten any better would be if a unicorn would descend from the heavens with a nacho bell grande in a bag around its horn beat boxing Hakunah Matata.
I know it sounds all cute and shit that I wanted him to be with me last night, but it's not cute. I just wanted to fuck.
The highlight of the trip was definitely my dad telling me that I "used to be his prettiest daughter."
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
I literally just want someone to fuck me and buy me cheeseburgers. I don't even want a relationship at this point. Just a chew toy and some food.
Just had a small freak out because I couldn't get my bra unhooked and thought I was gonna be stuck in it forever.
Got pulled over today for going 90 in a 40 zone with my leg out of the window. Still got out of the ticket. I'm getting way too good at this. Wanna trade bodies so we can see if it's my boobs or my charm?
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