how do we leave politely?
Tell them I'm going into labor. I will spill a beer and tell them m water broke.
There r osticjed everywhere
I like to think of them as justice herpes. She cheats on me and gets more than she bargained for.
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
I woke up and watched my kitten suck on his nipple. Way too hungover to intervene. He thought it was me, so he just giggled and mumbled "mmm girl."
Seriously? God I hope he wasn't lactating.
......... Poor kitty
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
But once you explained how to fill cupcakes with semen I realize you were harmless and right on my level.
we superglued breast forms to his chest. those aren't coming off anytime soon.
If they could bottle a hangover it would taste exactly like lemon lime Gatorade and failed hopes and dreams
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
He referred to our sex as "an Olympic event." My tits are bruised.
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
Not going to lie, when I looked in the tub I expected to see what might have been remnants of a squirrel.
Randomize
